On January 21st, my wife and I attended the later Sunday service, and were trying to drop off our…read moretwo year old son at the child care. Unfortunately, he was scared and began to cry nonstop. He had been twice before and both times when we left him AND when we picked him up after service he was crying, meaning he'd be crying for about an hour. We didn't leave him again because we didn't want him crying for that long. The child care staff was completely understanding and said we could always bring him back if we decided to do so.
We took him into the service with us and all was great until 10 minutes before the service ended. One of the staff members came over to my wife and told her that she and my son had to leave the service and go to the lobby because they were being disruptive. Let it be known that my son was being extremely quiet. He did not cry or talk loudly at all. There were no signs and none of the ushers or staff members who opened the door and even sat us at the service with our child told us at any point that children were not allowed. My wife nursed him on and off, so maybe that contributed to them being thrown out.
After the service, the staff member, CT, came over to my wife and I to try to better explain why my wife and son were asked to leave -- something along the lines of how my son was being disruptive and that we should consider taking him to the child care. I explained that we did try that, and he was scared and we could not just leave him there AGAIN. He also said that if it were his kids who were being disruptive (again with the insinuation that my son was disruptive when this was not the case), he would take them to the child care section or the parent care room. Well guess what? We would have stepped out too if our kid was being disruptive, but he wasn't, and if a two-year old is scared and crying, they need their parents. Any caring parent would be more understanding and compassionate than to leave their child when they need them the most.
I read a previous review from Christmas week and how a mother and child also went through the same ordeal. The church will probably give the same response in this case: "...there's a child room for that..." and "...every single week people are coming to Collective who are hanging on by a thread and they are hoping that Jesus can help them and we want to make sure nothing distracts them from hearing about God's grace and endless second chances." So if you're a parent who is struggling and hanging by a thread, and you don't have the heart to leave your child crying for an hour, look elsewhere. This is not the church for you. I would also imagine that if you are the non-parent hanging by a thread, the last thing in your mind would be the well-behaved child next to you.
As for the parent care room which they will also mention in their reply, we got an email that says the following about it: "Parent Care Room: This quiet space for parents who need to feed, change, or calm down their child is now located next to our Nursery and Check In space, for security and your convenience. While there is a TV in this room, the goal is to have this be a QUICK PIT STOP for you to care for your child, before sending them back to our Collective Kids Classrooms." So, I'm guessing you'll get kicked out of there too if you take too long.
So in other words, Collective is saying to hell when the kids need comfort from their parents, let's worry about everyone else? Well what if the parents are also struggling or hanging on by a thread, too?
Bottom line, my family and I will never return to this church. Looks can be deceptive and that's exactly what this church is. All show, but when it comes down to it, they just don't care. It was a punch in the face when we needed it the most.
