I am still in a bit of post-traumatic shock as I reflect on the appalling state of security onboard the Historic KSVR. Check-in was alright and smooth. We got our reserved tickets promptly and was pleased to find that we were seated in the passenger cars, not like the latecomers who were condemned to open-air second-class cars at the same price. As we waited to board, a marshal came through looking at everyone sternly and asking whether they had weapons. Not exactly the TSA but it seemed like he would maintain order, and it was a strange punctuation to the festive mood set by the jovial tunes of one Felix Possak on the keyboards.
We boarded the cushy passenger car, albeit with reduced leg room - it's historic! The conductor was a great guide as he described the many views as we headed toward the end of the line toward a great bridge. Super bonus that we saw some very fast black bears running around a farm. My advice is that if you can get seating on the east side of the train, you are best positioned for the most awesome pictures. Still, we did get to disembark once we started heading back from the bridge and get out to take some glorious photos overlooking the valley and with the historic engine. Some hawkers are selling berries at $5 for a small tub - can you say Great Train Robbery?
This was where my confidence in the security started to get shaky. The Marshal did nothing to crack down on the over-priced berries (although they were delicious). And he did earlier warn us about some "floozies" who we'd be picking up at the stop. To the delight of most of the 18+ passengers onboard who were looking for a Vegas experience, said women came onboard. I'm not sure if they paid the same fare as us as one of them unhesitatingly invented a middle seat for herself and plopped down right between my friend and I. She showed us the contents of her case. I was particularly interested in her copy of The Habitant, which was a fake french-canadian book of poems. She showed my friend her "spreadsheets". We had seen too much already, and will somebody think of the children! Obviously the ladies caused us to lower our guard as they planted kisses on many a passenger. The young ones "deputized" by the Marshal for greater security simply looked on, jaws agape at the frivolity.
By letting our guards down, that's when we were led into the trap. We passed our final destination station, allegedly for a special treat from the conductor, to see the Engine do one more switch before letting us back toward the station. My spidey sense was tingling - we already saw the engine switch once already! Then the sounds of bullets whizzing by started, and we saw on either side of us armed bandits on horseback surrounding us guns ablazing in the air. We are promptly boarded and the next thing I know, the pathetic Marshal has already quickly surrendered. He caves in telling us to listen to the bandits and hand over our change - nope, the bandits don't take Air Miles and they don't take credit/debit. Hard Cash is what they want - not even jewelry. The deputies are useless, we are entirely helpless, and the lack of a second amendment means we can't stand our ground in this situation. As the men on horseback ride up and down the carts pointing menacingly at us, women bandits and some dressed exactly like the floozies who boarded earlier (one was an evil twin sister!) came down the aisles collecting loose change in their sacks. They eventually left us alone and walked away with 6 huge sacks of loot.
Now I'm appalled - I don't know how other people coped with this drama, but as we headed to finally return to our station, the conductor continued describing the landscape AS IF NOTHING TRAUMATIC HAD JUST HAPPENED! The only thing that put me out of my shock was the wafting smells of baked beans, all you can eat roast beef and baked chicken finished with a strawberry-rhubarb crisp. And then the final proof that everybody was in cahoots was the shocking sight of the bandits rolling in to the parking lot on a truck and sitting down and dining amongst us. Everybody was too petrified to say anything so I guess our coping mechanism was to look straight ahead and eat on as if those who just robbed us weren't eating with us. I'm willing to forgive - they didn't get much from me, but I hear they promised to direct their loot to good local causes, so I suppose that's a good sign of reform.
I wouldn't let such trauma dissuade anyone from riding on the KSVR but be warned of those bandits! One's fragile heart can only take so much. read more