Whether your professional network has more holes than Phillip Seymour Hoffman's arm or you're just looking for a guy that's sponge-worthy, you need to shuffle your lovely lady lumps (or marvelous man mounds) over to the Network and Social events. For $13, I attended the one at the Godfrey Hotel and was pleased to find the event combined a reasonable turn-out (~100 attendees) with a good caliber of people (i.e. no one had to install Acrobat Reader to print out their degree). This, in contrast to some other networking groups I've visited. For instance, I love the Network After Work events, but can they consider capping the attendance at around 100,000 because it's hard to move around (but great for a game of "Chilean miner"). Then of course, there's Meetup.com, the Baltic Ave. of social networking sites, where you can finally answer the question -- who is causing all those amber alerts on my phone? Anyway, unlike bowling or prom, this is one activity you can attend by yourself without others pointing and laughing. Everyone at the event takes a name tag, color-coded according to your profession. I met folks from real estate, law, finance, and even a life coach. I didn't realize that was a real job, but she was telling me she helps her clients "reach their full potential and live the happiest and healthiest lives possible" Sadly, she wasn't interested in hearing me play "Amazing Grace" on my armpit. Most people wore the appropriate business casual attire. Of course, not everyone got the memo. One uncombed patron looked really out of sorts in his lumberjack shirt and jeans (imagine the Brawnee paper towel guy with down syndrome). Not by coincidence, this guy's breath was so bad it interfered with my cell phone signal. No matter, the fact that there's no loud music playing means I could hear people, and more importantly, they could hear me. BTW, if Ms. I--Need-To-Go-To-The-Bathroom-Before-Anthony-Has-Finished-His-Story is reading, let me conclude my tale by saying she looked 18 and besides, I don't speak sign language. There were also a couple of vendors there., for example, Social Enjoyment. They make low-calorie, gluten free alcoholic drinks that won't cause harm to your body. That's great, but what about the damage that's done to your body after you get housed? How does Social Enjoyment intend to relieve my lower back pain after a night of passing out in the dryer? Also there was a charity there selling $1 tickets to their raffle. I have to deduct a star because you had to be present to win. Seriously, you can't email the outcomes? Seemed to work fine when I got my HIV test results (although I didn't like the ":(" in the subject line). read more