I've got a feeling I'm developing agoraphobia as I age (complicated by cataracts) because I never…read moreused to hesitate about taking long, long "road trips" to places I had never been before, or was unfamiliar with if I had been, and now...I'm very much hesitant. Philadelphia is just 1 example of that. My oldest friend has been living there for several years (his main residence is in Florida) and he keeps inviting me down. i did go down there to visit him once (I wrote a review of the Liberty Bell as a result of that visit) but I was nervous all the time I was there and couldn't wait to leave before dark. It hasn't helped that "Parking Wars" became a thing on TV at the time agoraphobia began developing in me. I had never worried about parking in Philly in the past, but I was (am) now!
As a kid, the cities I was familiar with were NYC, Paterson, Newark, Hackensack. Philly was unknown to me; it might as well have been in another country. The 1st time I went was with a friend who needed to get his passport there in order to travel to Italy (not really sure what that was all about, but I was willing to take a train ride with him down). I found the Reading Terminal Market colorful, we went to a bookstore or 2, and we ate dinner at a Northern Italian restaurant (different from the Southern Italian restaurants I was used to). Nothing so astoundingly attractive that I felt an irresistable urge to return any time soon.
A few years later, 2 friends wanted to ride down there, and... once again...I tagged along. Some vibrant nightlife (and a "porno area" that seemed smaller and less sordid than what Times Square in NYC was offering at the time), but...again...the appeal of the city was basically lost on me.
A few years later, I wanted to search out 2 cemeteries that were in that general vicinity. One...Holy Cross in Yeadon...I wrote a review about. Another...Union Hill Cemetery in Kennett Square, about a half hour south of Philly...had the grave of actress Linda Darnell and introduced me to the Baldwin Book Barn, which I also wrote about on Yelp. That area around Kennett Square had a lasting appeal for me but Philly still had no concomitant allure.
Still...gradually...incrementally...I ventured more and more into the city on my own, even though I never became very familiar or comfortable with it. I'd park near City Hall and walk down to the Bellevue Hotel, which had a Rizzoli bookstore in it. I also visited some other used book stores (the names escape me now). Sometimes I'd stop for a quick visit to the city while on my way to Kennett Square. A few times, I went with friends. At 1 point, I dated a young woman in a West Philly suburb, but we spent most of our time in the Brandywine Valley, not Philly.
Some scattered impressions remain with me. I remember seeing 1 of the "Hellraiser" movies at an old theater in Philly. This series of films, while somewhat original and appealingly Lovecraftian, were very violent and bloody. I remember seeing a couple at the movie with their 5 year old child, and thinking to myself, "Who would bring a kid to see a movie like this? No wonder there are psychos in the world."
Another time, a (late) friend and I were drinking in the city. We passed an alleyway, and at the end of it were 2 rats, an animal I'm terrified of. We stared at the rats from our end, and they stared back at us. Suddenly, they started bolting towards us. We turned and ran hard. Either the rats lost interest or were out of shape, because they didn't catch us.
I heard a story from a paternal biological relative about a cousin who lived in Lyndhurst, NJ. This cousin was a severe alcoholic and made an heroic recovery before cancer felled him (we were able to establish a relationship before he died and I was at his funeral). This relative said the cousin called him once after a binge and had no idea where he had awakened or how he had gotten there (he didn't drive or have a car). It was some city street, foreign to him. The relative asked him to read off a few street signs and was able to finally determine that the cousin had somehow gotten from north NJ to Philly while in a drunken blackout.
just a few days ago, I was talking to my oldest friend, who moved out of Philly and is living in South Jersey with his girlfriend until he can move everything down to Florida. He ventured back into Philly to take care of some business and was accosted by a homeless woman, who began yelling semi-coherent abuse at him. My friend has a kind heart, and normally would fork over money, but he didn't this time. I haven't been to a major city in years, and I expressed surprise. He said, "Are you kidding? There's homeless people all over Philly.'
It's historic, obviously, and...in its own unique way.... beautiful. Supposedly, it always had a "2nd best" syndrome in comparison to NYC and I certainly get that. But, speaking subjectively, I never really warmed to it, and can take it or leave it alone.
Faint praise indeed, but it's how I feel.