SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET…read more
Spirit Halloween is mostly crap--we know it, they know it.
Don't mind me, just airing out my grievances against this chain of seasonal décor stores. I could start by bashing Spirit for charging insane prices, but that's too obvious. Maybe I should dog them on their unforgiving return policy, or the fact that no store ever appears in the same location twice (making it impossible to find the correct spot on Yelp).
There's really no point in updating the address, since 9 months from now Spirit will take over (ahem, *possess*) whatever empty business is lying around. This store was on Army Trail Rd near Best Buy/Jo Ann Fabrics, in a shopping area called Bloomingdale Court. I visited in early October, long before the store has had a chance to get trashed by unsupervised children.
The big ticket items are looking uglier and uglier, like they're straight off of Wish.com. The demented clowns and shrieking zombies look unintentionally hilarious and reek of a horsesh*t build quality. I stood inside for a solid minute, staring at (what appeared to be) a werewolf-type monster, thinking "what IS this, and why does its growling sound like a broken Nutribulllet??"
Many of their products often malfunction, get returned, and wind up back on the shelves. This is especially true with electronics like fog machines or the motion-activated spider, as there's no easy way to repair shoddy wiring. Over the years, I've seen scores of 'open box' discounts that I've been wise enough to avoid. DO NOT buy anything with moving parts from Spirit.
A plastic 5ft poseable skeleton was a whopping $100! For that price, you can probably get a REAL skeleton (just ask the props department from the movie Poltergeist ^). The exact same item at Home Depot was only $30; Spirit, care to explain why your stuff is TRIPLE the cost of a competitor?
One thing that didn't suck: a set of Ghostbusters window clings ($10) that includes a terror dog, Gozor, the ghost librarian, Ectomobile, Slimer, and the Stay Puft marshmallow man. Also a decent purchase was a ouija board doormat ($21) that was discounted 20% thanks to a mail offer. They had a lot of doormat designs--Stranger Things, Hocus Pocus, Harry Potter, Buffy, etc.
The guy at checkout was cool, but his pleasant attitude couldn't mask all the junk surrounding him. Only shop here if you've got a sizeable coupon, and even then be smart about your purchase--odds are good you won't be getting a refund.
* TL;DR *
To say that Spirit's products are cheap Chinese knockoffs is an affront to China and an insult to cheap knockoffs.
Every year in early August, these stores pop up like warts on a mutant's ass, claiming abandoned storefronts to peddle their oft-broken and overpriced wares. By 10/31, the shelves are cluttered with returns marked "15% off due to wires not working", and by November 3rd Spirit has packed up whatever garbage didn't sell and vanishes into the night.
Not unlike visiting the apple orchard, dragging these guys on Yelp has become a yearly tradition. I love October, but I hate Spirit for their price gouging practices on bottom-tier merchandise. All stores are virtually the same, and all of them are equally loathsome.
^ yes, they used actual human remains in the climactic scene with JoBeth Williams' character from 1982's Poltergeist. Don't waste your time with the 2015 remake, stick with the original, and remember that at the tail end of the movie those hyper-realistic skeletons bobbing around in the pool were living, breathing people at one point...now that's freakin' scary!
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!