After six years of going to Derby, there is always something new to see and new memories to make.
I hope that after living in this city for several more decades, I still look forward to Derby as much as I do now.
But rather than write a poor imitation of Hunter S. Thompson's "The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved" -- yes, the fancy people can be found puking up their mint juleps if you look for it, and the infield can be a debaucherous mess full of bourbon Slip 'N' Slides -- I'm using this review to share a few things I've learned about Derby.
So here are some tips to help you come out of Derby with (most) of your money, with all of the items you walked into Churchill Downs with and with a pleasant memory to look back on.
The first is kind of obvious but bears repeating: Don't bet more than what you're comfortable with. Whether that's $2 or $2,000, know your limit, and look at betting on the Derby race, especially, more as a way to get in on the fun rather than as a payday.
If you're a lady, come to Derby in a fancy hat at least once. The hats are my favorite part, I'll admit, and I relish the opportunity to wear a big, colorful chapeau. Go out and find a hat that makes you feel special; you'll feel special all day wearing it.
But even if you wear a fancy hat, don't wear heels -- or rather, don't wear heels unless you have a private, inside box to walk around in barefoot. I've seen many ladies hobble out of Churchill Downs at the end of the day -- and it wasn't because of the mint juleps. They looked in pain, taking short little steps -- definitely not chic. Save yourself by wearing flats or better yet, stow a pair of flip flops in your purse.
Grab all the cash you'll need before you come. The ATM lines are a major time-suck, and they carry hefty fees. But conversely, the women's restroom lines look like they'll take all day, but they really don't. So when you get in line several hundred feet from the restroom, know that you'll be back to watching the races very soon.
While the alcohol booths may all look the same, they aren't. Yes, some specialize in expensive, Woodford Reserve mint juleps, while others have the Early Times variety. But even among them, there are good and bad bartenders. If you find a booth that is heavy on the bourbon, stick with it. It also seemed like some of the bartenders put their own spins on the alcoholic beverages -- for better or for worse.
If you can at all swing it, buy a seat. Don't do the GA pass for the infield and paddock. After a long hot day around Churchill, a seat to call your own from which you can actually see the track is priceless.
And similarly, spring for parking in the 'hood around Churchill if you can. It can be worth the $20 or $30. The wait for the shuttle back to Papa John's Stadium can take agonizingly long at the end of the day and the walk to the stadium from Churchill can feel twice as long as it really is, if you decide to forgo the shuttle -- especially if you did not heed my advice above and wore heels. Parking in a random guy's front yard that's a hop, skip and a jump from the track will seem delightful come 6:30 p.m. -- and that random guy might just be having a cook-out and give you a free hotdog.
If you find a sale on rain ponchos during April, seize upon it, and grab a few. If Derby is rainy, you'll be happy you saved some moolah from not having to buy a marked-up, thin piece of plastic. And your pretty hat will be safe.
Learn the words to "My Old Kentucky Home" -- or at least be sober enough to read them from the large screens around Churchill when they play it before the big race. It really helps get you into the Derby spirit.
Louisville is blessed to have the Kentucky Derby. Be smart about it, and you can have a great time at the track. read more