I've been thrifting since I was 13; nearly my entire wardrobe is second-hand. I visit thrift stores all over the triangle a couple times a week, but had never ventured in to A-Z. Most of their items were home goods, books, trinkets etc. It was extremely organized, more like a retail shop than a thrift store. I came in while my dog was having biopsies and joint taps done at NCSU on the first Thursday of the month-- which is senior discount day. The woman behind the counter, who was probably in her late 70s/ early 80s looked me up and down with a confused countenance, then slowly offered "senior...?" Let's take a hard pause here; I am 39 years old, started going grey in my 20s, and stopped dyeing my hair about 7 years ago. Granted I was wearing it long, and was somewhat windswept and frizzy on a rainy day-- and I have barely been getting any sleep after doing hospice-intensity caretaking for a 55 lb dog 24/7. I get that they wanted to make sure I wasn't missing my discount...but after the conversation that ensued in which the original commenter as well as her co-volunteer continued to stick their feet further in their mouths, it became clear that while they seriously wondered whether I was 25+ years older than I am is because they are carrying some big misconceptions/judgements about youth, beauty, femininity. These volunteers may be "transforming the lives of women, children and families through community programs", but they apparently don't know what F-E-M-I-N-I-S-M is, and certainly didn't sound like they ever got on board back when the second wave was happening. I haven't felt so judged and looked over since the last time I walked through SOHO-- and there I was getting compliments left and right on my epic silver hair. I left with a pair of jeans and a 70s photography book. I also almost left with a mid-life crisis thanks to a heavy dose of Southern cattiness. The tears I held back when I got into my car and the past week of slathering on concealer and red lipstick have helped me reflect on my own vanity and the work I need to do on/for myself as a feminist. But it also made me realize that thrift stores, in general, make sense as places that offer a sense of belonging to people from all walks of life. So while I can be grateful for the wake-up call and the more conscious appreciation of the other thrift stores I frequent, I won't be going back to A-Z. read more