Dr. Ajayi was our family physician. From the beginning of our interactions, I experienced what I…read moreperceived as a rude, dismissive, and unprofessional attitude during appointments.
On one occasion, I was trying to translate for my brother because he has limited English proficiency. The doctor interrupted and insisted that he answer questions on his own. On another visit, when my mother tried to help me answer a question during my appointment, the doctor stated that only I should respond and said that if my mother continued speaking for me, she would have to leave the examination room.
My mother had a painful skin lesion on her leg for about six months. At the first appointment, the doctor examined it, identified it as a mole, and said it could be removed at a follow-up visit. We returned as scheduled and waited for some time. However, during the follow-up appointment, she unexpectedly said it was not a mole but an ingrown hair and advised my mother to go to a cosmetic clinic and pay for removal.
I pointed out that she had previously said it was a mole and expressed that, in my opinion, it did not appear to be an ingrown hair. In response, the doctor stated, "Are you going to teach me how to do my job?" Later, my mother sought a second opinion from another physician, who confirmed that it was not an ingrown hair but another type of condition.
During the same period, we requested referrals to specialists: a dermatologist for my mother and an ENT specialist for me, due to ongoing breathing difficulties. The doctor told us that the referrals would be sent directly to the specialists, so we were not given copies.
Over the following weeks, I repeatedly called the clinic to check whether my ENT referral had been submitted. I was given different explanations each time: sometimes I was told there was a backlog, and other times no one answered the phone. When I called again because my breathing issues were ongoing and I wanted to see a specialist as soon as possible, I was informed that Dr. Ajayi had refused to send the referral, stating that she believed I had been rude to her. I was also told to find a different clinic and a new family doctor.
I strongly disagree with this characterization. From the beginning, I treated the doctor with respect. However, I believe that patients have the right to ask questions, clarify contradictory medical information, and advocate for their health or the health of their family members. My intention was never to be rude; I was simply raising concerns and seeking appropriate medical care.
Unfortunately, throughout our time as her patients, my family and I felt that our concerns and health issues were not taken seriously. We often did not receive adequate attention or follow-up for our medical concerns. As a result, my entire family decided to transfer to a different family physician.
I understand that finding a family doctor is not easy, and I do believe that physicians deserve respect. However, respect must be mutual. Patients also deserve professional, respectful, and attentive care, and their medical concerns should be addressed properly and in a timely manner. Throughout my experience, I believe I remained respectful; when I raised concerns, it was only in response to conflicting information or what I perceived as inappropriate handling of medical issues. Advocating for one's health is not disrespectful--it is a necessary part of patient care.
