Most other places don't know how to DO TEA
Tastes so bad it makes you say, SCREW TEA
Some boba is awful, makes you wanna BOO TEA
But that'll change when you try Kung FU TEA
When you taste this one, you'll see you never KNEW TEA
Finding the Lemon Black has really been a COUP TEA
If you wanna be a Playmate, this can be your HUGH TEA
That's why you have to come straight to Kung FU TEA
WHAT
Located near relatives houses in New Caney, which is a good 25 or so miles N-NE of Houston right along Hwy 59 aka I-69.
We were delighted to see a Kung Fu Tea open up right in New Caney next to 2 major hwys (Grand Parkway also passes this point). It may be one of the locations which is owned by the same guy that owns the Chinatown one - I'm not sure. I'll let you know once I know.
But there's literally no good boba this far out, so it's wonderful for the community all the way up here to now have an excellent, spacious, nicely designed and very friendly KFT here. I like it better than the Woodlands location.
Kung Fu TEA
It's great for ME
I stop by here for a drink or THREE
Keep coming BACK
For Lemon BLACK
Feel so addicted maybe they use CRACK
I'm not SURE
But it tastes so PURE
Bobaddiction is my sickness and there is no CURE
So I'll get the BOBA
And then I'll go OVER
To Barbie's hotel room so I can DISROBE HER
Anyway, enough about the perfect Barbie
You better get your ass to K - F - T
This location is friendly, and didn't mind serving me 15 mins before closing which I really appreciated.
The milk teas at KFT don't really do it for me, they're different, but not awful, however the fruit drinks are great, especially when you get them with black tea, which they might adjust for you if you bat your lashes.
What to get: Lemon Black Tea With Tapioca!
Or: All the fruit teas are pretty good, especially if you go off menu and get black tea!
Or: Go crazy and order your fruit teas with the very strong Oolong!
Or in winter: Any of the hot milk teas!
Which milk teas are best: Honey Oolong! Oolong! Maybe Taro or Almond! I also love the regular milk tea with Oreo!
The Lemon Black Tea is the best
Like Barbie's shoes or her fake breast
It tastes like a dream
And can make Barbie cream
This boba is better than the rest
So instead of showing your crack
And being asked to please stop coming back
Go to Kung Fu Tea
And drink boba with me
And I'll share my fave drink: Lemon Black. read more