*This review is from June 2023, I forgot to post it, accuracy was preserved with Word…read more
Came for brunch. Menus were confusing, printed on paper in landscape format. Choices were limited to 'small and large plates', there was no appetizer section. We were asked "sparkling bottled ($$) or tap water?". We chose tap. Server brought an old-style quart-size milk bottle and small juice-size glasses. The water had no ice, so I assumed water was cold, it wasn't. I ordered a 'breakfast' stout, my wife coffee. Stout was served in a wine glass, not a traditional pint glass. Wife said coffee wasn't that hot. When they brought our beverages, wife asked for a napkin since none were on the table. Like most civilized countries, I like to put a napkin in my lap when I sit down in a restaurant. Apparently you need to ask for one here. Young server muttered something about place settings are brought when food is delivered. I guess an ale and coffee aren't napkin worthy. Not sure what they accomplish with this goofy policy. It looks more like some kind of cost cutting measure. We made reservations a week earlier, wanted us to confirm a second time through text the same morning. It led me to think this must be a popular place with people clamouring to get in.
Once there, place wasn't bust at all, no waiting customers and a sea of unoccupied tables. Our guest arrived after we ordered our beverages. After a few minutes, I ended up flagging down a server to get her a drink. Another sign we were stuck with a 2nd or 3rd-string staff. Our aunt ordered a specialty drink from their menu; "champagne in a laundry basket", (looked more like laundry water in a wash tub). After taking our orders, paper menus were collected to be reused. Maybe they were saving money on copy paper. I kinda' wish she left one in case we wanted desserts or something later. They were keeping the table clear of literally everything. I ordered a humus plate for use as an appetizer, something to share and couldn't be screwed up while waiting for our main course. When entrees showed up, we all chose 'smoked sausage eggs-benedict', extra servers were in tow with plates, napkins and silverware, napkin place settings given after all plates were on the table. My wife was seated across from me, sitting next to her Aunt Nan. The first plate was placed in front of me. Even being the neanderthal caveman I am, I knew this was the most basic etiquette faux pas (I felt humiliated j/k). Ladies are ALWAYS served first, another red flag from an inexperienced staff. The 'smoked sausage' Eggs Benedict failed on many levels. It wasn't hot, poached eggs were both over and under-cooked- egg whites had chunky white snot, yolks were not runny. The 'smoked sausage', was kielbasa logs cut in half lengthwise, they were overcooked and impossible to cut without flattening and mutilating egg and muffin. They could be used as wheel chocks, I had to deconstruct it so sausage could be wrestled with on the side. Wife said the 'homemade' English muffin had the tap water taste like what we were served 'for free'. I couldn't help but envision a garden hose filling a mop bucket used for filling the milk bottles. The Hollandaise sauce lacked silky richness and flavor, I've had better with McCormick packets. Benedict was overpowered with the taste of the smoked sausage. This meal was our aunt's special treat for our birthdays. They did not finish their meals, leaving mostly the pieces of the hockey puck-hard sausage. Server had been touting the pastry chef for the home-made English muffins. They were not any better than Thomas's English muffins. I am a plate-cleaner by habit, I've even been called human garbage disposal, so I managed to clear this one, (except for the egg snot, it would've taken a straw to finish it). My wife always has leftovers I happily dispose of quietly, not this time, gave it a hard pass. I felt unfulfilled, I was food frustrated, so I ordered some bacon cheese scones and shared them with the table. They turned out to be the best thing we had, warm Bisquick quality with a good taste of bacon and cheese almost as addicting as Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. We consumed them like a pack of hungry wolves. I asked and was told they don't serve them with butter. These begged for butter. IMO, butter should already be on the table. My wife picked this venue for our birthday treat meal with our beloved Aunt Nan from MA treating us. I apologized to her for our disappointing choice. She said she was glad I said it, she didn't want to say anything to make us feel bad. With tip, the bill for 3 was $171.00. We could have had a better meal and service at an IHOP for a quarter of the cost, I know I would have felt more satisfied. This experience made onto my list of top 5 worst eating experiences.