I came to having doula services through Ann Kaplan quite by accident and completely against my…read morewill. I only wanted someone to keep me company while I received better and more thorough drugs than my previous traumatic child-bearing experiences, which persons educated childbirthing these days will tell you is no longer en vogue. The reality is that while I was thrilled to be having another child, the idea of getting that child out of me was so incredibly terrifying that I could not envision a situation where that could happen, without it filling me with dread. As my due date was getting closer, my panic really started to rise.
So to jump way ahead, it was my husband who had heard about Ann Kaplan, from a colleague, also a husband. He came home and wanted to call this "birth coach", this "miracle worker" he'd heard about from a fellow GUY, who had sung Ann's praises. He said their birth experience had changed their lives, that his wife's fears were not only dissolved but it was this amazing bonding beautiful whole-family transformation to have their baby, completely naturally (!!!). No, no, no. I do not know what words were exchanged but my normally suspicious and totally impervious husband wanted to call her. I did not, and I cried and was more terrified than before. Somehow, we called her, she reluctantly agreed to meet with us, and then she waved her wand and she just simply changed our lives.
Ann and her approach and education of us as a couple and family changed pretty much every belief I held about giving birth, and reigned in my out-of-control fears in a way I didn't think was possible. She never said I had to do this naturally, she said she'd be there if I wanted drugs. She said I would want to move around though, I'd want to find what soothed me(like a warm bath) and I couldn't do that with an epidural in ( she would turn out to be correct). She drove next to us on the highway in the middle of the night, with me backwards in the passenger seat, with her shouting encouragement to me. She walked ahead of me in the hospital and protected me, advocated for me, stayed with me every second, talked me through every contraction. Beautifully, naturally, incredibly guided us, as we welcomed our babies with love and a total lack of fear.
To say that my daughters' births, coached by Ann and my husband, were some of the most powerful, healing and transformative experiences of my life is a pathetic understatement. I am a different person because of what Ann did for our family. We are a different family, because of Ann's gift in supplying that safe and educated space for us to expand. I wholeheartedly believe we have a different bond with our daughters than we would have without Ann. Without dipping into sappy, or metaphysical, or religious, or other realms that might make your eyes roll, having had both medicated "paralyzed" births and supported, coached, and empowered births, I promise you there is a huge and powerful gift in being present and participatory in actually "giving" birth... I am so proud of myself, having accomplished this and provided this for my children, and infinitely more aware of my own ability to make choices for myself and my family.
So I'm the unlikeliest of clients and now one of the biggest converts to the idea of Doula-supported birthing, and I passionately encourage you to go through Ann Kaplan even if you, like me, were only considering a better epidural. I PROMISE, you will not regret it.
