I'm begging you to read this review before you step foot in PIMMS. I certainly wish I had heeded the words of others before this travesty.
My friend and I walk in to PIMMS, a cute restaurant that has Pinterest worthy decor, for a quick bite to eat while waiting for our tour at Palácio da Bolsa. We think pizza sounds good and I tell her I will ask the waitress how long a pizza will take since we only have a half hour. I am American, but speak some Portuguese, enough to get around. I ask in my best Portuguese how long a pizza usually takes and she says ten minutes, gesturing to the pizza oven in the back of the restaurant. So it begins...we order the Bacon pizza which comes with tomato, mozzarella, mushrooms, and pineapple, a cappuccino, and a water. It is 13 euros for only the pizza, I believe. Not more than thirty seconds later, the pizza arrives on our table. I shouldn't even call it a pizza...upon investigation, there is no evidence of warmth and the crust is still pale; my friend thought she was showing us the uncooked pizza to make sure we were okay with it. She was mistaken. Upon closer inspection, the pizza's cheese is melted and it's cut into slices, we assume this is our finished product, and since the waitress left, it appears that it was. After making it a few bites in, we both knew we were only eating for necessity because it was easily the worst pizza we both have ever eaten--salty yet bland, the pineapple tasted like nothing, bacon questionably safe for consumption, and cold. It was at best, a couple of degrees above room temperature. There was no way that pizza was in any oven in the past 45 minutes. We picked for about ten minutes before we decided our bodies couldn't take anymore. The waitress slips a card to me with a number on it. I assume I am supposed to use it to pay at the counter, but when I ask at the counter if this is where I pay I get told to wait for my waitress. Nevertheless, another waiter comes to take care of me. While settling my bill, it appears that the waitress charged me 4 euros for a beer instead of the 50 cent water I ordered. I correct the check with the man helping me and he asks who my waitress was. I tell him and his body language and tone leads me to believe that my waitress might have been trying to pull a fast one on me since she knows I am a tourist. I typically give people a benefit of the doubt, but this seems a bit coincidental. Nothing felt better but leaving the rest of that sad pizza on its tray and walking out of that god forbidden place. If you are headed to PIMMS for food, which will likely be a hamburger or pizza, save your money and get food of the same (better?) quality by eating the cold remnants of food left on plates waiting to be picked up by a waiter on an outdoor cafe table. read more