I honestly believed the problem was with my daughter (as often is) - boy was I wrong. Dr. Rothman "diagnosed" my daughter with sleep apnea due to obstruction (enlarged tonsils) and tried to convince me it was the source of my daughter's anxiety toward his office and her general crankines (of course, it couldn't just be because she was a toddler and that her father and I were divorcing, as I'd explained) . I took her to an EMT who conceded they were a bit large, but not out of the normal range for her age. He offered to take them out if I wanted, but stated that he didn't believe it was necessary.
The next appointment we went to went horribly. The dental tech we had was male, which freaked my daughter out (she was just becoming ok with the dentist and was excited about seeing the ladies). I was upset by her reaction, but I offered to hold her; that's when the tech rolled his eyes at me and said no, I couldn't do that - I tried not to react, but my daughter sensed my tension and it upset her. Everything went from bad to worse.
Dr. Rothman was being forceful with her, and she extended her foot like she was going to poke/kick him with it. Now, I have no tolerance for that kind of behavior and would have gone old-school on her (though she didn't actually do it, even acting like it is a huge no no!) but before I could do anything Dr. Rothman grabbed her foot and acted in a threatening manner toward her "Were you going to kick me?! Is that what you were going to do?!" He then proceeded to tell her that if she did that again I would have to leave the room, and she'd be left alone with him and his hygienist. Yes...that is what this man told my 4 year old daughter who suffered from separation anxiety. Of course things were awful and he couldn't complete the exam. He then cornered me and asked why I hadn't had her tonsils out - I told him what the EMT said, but he scoffed and downgraded Kaiser (true in some regards, but I don't believe so in this case). He looked at me and said that as a mother, it was my responsibility to have my child's tonsils out, and if I didn't it was because I wasn't putting her needs first.
I took my daughter to another EMT, who found her throat was catching up with her tonsils. We even did a sleep study, though it was inconclusive because we couldn't keep the equipment hooked up to her. Needless to say, despite her severe allergies, she rarely snores and is doing well. Oh yeah, and since we switched dentists over a year ago, she LOVES to go have her teeth cleaned. Never...NEVER...was there an instance at this new place, which goes to show how much atmosphere effects kids. read more