So while I haven't worn my black cap when I've been reviewing this one, I HAVE had an AMAZING night both times that I've been here. In fact, this club was the first club I visited after I decided to start reviewing strip clubs. While I was unable to properly formulate a review the first night, I can say with confidence that my second visit has solidified this club as my favorite of every strip club I've been to thus far, which is certainly saying something! Details: lap dances range from ten to forty dollars depending on what you want and who you pick, although my personal favorites are Alexandria and Persia, who both charged me ten dollars per song, (though your mileage may vary if you're an asshole. Duh.) and Nikki, who is a petite little thing but well worth her twenty dollar dances. Drinks range from 3-12ish bucks plus tips. I've personally always had coke when I'm there, but they advertise $3 fireball shots, and their prices rise accordingly. Waitstaff are friendly and attentive. So much of this club is that the real party almost doesn't start until almost midnight, and in fact when I showed up at five pm the first time, I wound up playing with the boxing machine with the owner and a few other guys and dancers for almost three hours before things started to get exciting. Cons of a small city club, but I had fun anyway! Major pro of this small scale city club is that you can have the time of your life here on a budget. 200$ gets you a very fun time, 500$ makes you a baller, and $1000 makes you the #1 VIP. I've spent $4000 in a club before and felt less welcome than I have spending an eighth of that here. Come one come all, to the best club in Albuquerque. read more

It's very chill inside everyone seems nice and the bouncer was calm and relaxed the atmosphere is very calm And drinks are cheap ! read more

absolutely love this place, so happy to see my friends here, come in, tip your doorman, dj, bartender, and your fav dancer, you will have a good time. bring $300 to have a good night. bring $1000 if you got the homies or for bachlor parties. private dances start at $25, no cover if you go early, and open from 2 pm till 3 am! read more

Bartender Kylie great server friendly polite great conversation makes the experience way cool

It was a great time until after we left and I found out one of the dancers named lyric was offering sexual services to my husband very unprofessional and illegal if I'm correct the only time I have had a bad time and will never be back until that girl is gone it's ridiculous we were tipping her well the other night to so to be so dirty and nasty is gross and a bad look read more

Great atmosphere. Friendly staff with beautiful girls. The girls didn't pressure us for a private dance but they did inform us of the locations and the rates. It's affordable fun. Be nice to these ladies,, they work hard and 5 out of the 6 had great personalities as well. read more

I love this place I go on Sunday nights to see my two favorite bartenders! The girls are beautiful and the drinks come out fast! 10 out of 10! read more

Great DJ Some big girls And some cute lil ones !! LOL So cheap for a this type of club 2 shots and two beers $20 read more

I travel for work so I've been to a lot of strip clubs and bars. This place is ghetto. A shot runs about 13 dollars. I wouldnt mind paying that if I actually saw some knockouts. It is an alright place if you just want to grab a quick drink but if you are looking for a knockout I would look elsewhere. The women are mediocre to average. I've been to better strip clubs but if you have low standards this is the place for you. I barhopped at the neighboring bars and found better eye candy there. Lots of rundown women in here. Maybe it was the time I went. read more

My fiance and I had a blast...... The girls were really great. They paid a lot of attention to my well endowed gorgeous fiance. Even the DJ commented on how much attention she was getting, and how much fun we were having. Our favorite dancer took exquisite care of us, performing the most sensual private couples dances for us. My God she was sexy . The drinks were strong, everyone was having a great time. read more

Knockouts - Dive Bars Near Me - Albuquerque, New Mexico

Took my girl on a date her once while back in town and she tipped a girl dancing on stage a buck. And the dancer went above and beyond for that tip by letting my girlfriend motorboat her on stage! Talk about customer service! read more

I was bored and decided to come here despite the bad reviews! I had a blast! Everyone was friendly and helpful. They even made sure I made it to my ride picking me up! Will definitely be back again! read more

This establishment allows homeless men to come in and take a nap. This is not a gentleman's club, because there are no gentleman that come in here. My friend is neighbors with a girl that works there that is a regular prostitute in and out of the club. The bartenders are rude and the DJs are boring. Every girl dances to the same boring crap. The dance prices are marked on flyers on the tables, but the dancers charge you extra. There are a lot of girls that are on drugs. They are sloppy and nasty. There are fat girls that look like men and skinny girls that look sick. Who hires these girls? The club is downtown in the middle of the largest homeless population I've ever seen. The bouncers are garbage. I have only ever seen one bouncer do his job. I've seen other patrons do things in this club that they would get arrested for or at least drug out for. This place smells like dirty vag and weed constantly. The stage looks like a cardboard box with a pipe running through it. I've watched the girls pull the pole out of the stage numerous times. I've watched girls stumble on stage because they were so trashed. I saw a girl fall asleep on stage. This club is not where you want to spend your night. I have a friend who danced there that told me all the nasty stuff that goes down there. Watch where you sit and bring hand sanitizer. Girls get fingered and do other nasty crap on those chairs. Keep your wallet close and ask a manager the price of a dance before you go back with a girl. They overcharge you for your dances and will try to complain to managers if you don't pay. Don't get too drunk. The girls will try to take advantage of you. read more

Titties everywhere Makin cash, shakin dat ass Wow what a Monday Must make this longer To become a real review Yelp dislikes haiku read more

be very careful me and my friends where trying to take a friend for his first time but the security was trying to stay with some of our money . my friends had already payed for us and he was still charging us $20 more and kept on telling us our friend didn't pay for us just to jack the money be very careful with the security there (RATEROS) not recommended he was not an honest guy read more

Friendly bar staff and waitresses. The bouncer is pretty cool, he's never given me problems. And they have some really fine ladies.

The sign outside says couples get in here for free. Well that's just a lie. Went in with my lady and they tried to charge us a cover. Needless to say we left and went to Taco Bell, where they forgot to give us napkins, but that's a review for another time.... get rid of that sign if you're not going to honor it. read more

Security guy at the door did not know what a hawaii state driver's license looks like and would not let us in. Went to TD's north and they scanned it.... and what do you know! It's a real ID and a real state. Don't waste your time here with ignorant and incompetent employees. read more

Great for a night out with some friends. Nice greeters at the door. Maybe wouldn't go too often but fun for a first time.

I have never had a bad experience and can't seem to get enough of this place. Raven and Senna are my world when they are there but getting a dance from anyone there so far has been a real exciting experience for me. I love the the music the DJ's play , bouncers are friendly, and the Bar keeps take care of me. Everyone needs to come out and have a good time and support the local talent!! read more

Who doesn't like ass n titties? But not these things here, sorry. I got a free dance from a newbie and she didn't smell great. There was one hot girl out of 15 near closing and me and my date got a fine dance. She even did stuff to me we didn't $$ for. Hearts for eyes! I love seeing fancy ladies dance, but it has ESP been in LA. It always was fun. Here was short, sad, desperate. Short songs, sad hopes, desperate feels everywhere. But also the bar closes early and the rest of the girls are bunk. Guys hanging around are creepy, especially outside. read more

Went to knockouts the other night and man I'm so glad it's open again. Some staff are new but other all the help and respect they give you is awesome. Some would call it a hole in the wall, others wouldn't call it anything. From good reviews to bad ones.... Knockouts is the place to be to sit back and relax and have a beer. Hell yea. read more

This place is run very well. From the upper management, to the DJs, to the doorgirl. It's a great place to stop in for a quick drink while you're in downtown Albuquerque read more

Since this was my first visit to a strip club, I can't fairly give it 5 stars, but the experience was exceptionally better than I could have imagined. First off, there's no cover before 9 on weekdays, and great happy hour prices from 6-9pm. The stage is nice, with plenty of ringside seats that are quite comfortable. Ample tables throughout as well. The LD section is lit just enough, and while the booths are more like ample cubby holes in a row, theyvprovide all the privacy you need. The "bubble room" is actually just a similar section of ubby holes at the back of the club. Overall lighting and decor is great. The dancers range in body type to suit all tastes, and are very friendly. Tanle dances are $5, LDs with one-way contact (them touching you) are $10/song, and two-way contact (you can touch their arms, sides, and legs are $20. I personally enjoyed the 2 way LDs, but for the submissive in me one-ways are great too.Talent ranges among the girls, but they all have different styles. Perhaps because of their style, some are better at showmanship, making you believe that they're yours for those 5-10 min. I recommend Hazel who was the first lady to give me a LD (the first lap dance I've ever had, actually.) She was talkative, sweet, and very nimble. Later I got some dances from Kaleea (I think that's spelled right) She had a very different style of dance, which was very sensual, and her years of experience show in her moves. I ended the night with several dances from Meghan, who provided a sublime experience, truly. For my first strip club experience, I think little else could have made for a better time. I will certainly return to this club for yet another memorable evening. Thank you to all the ladies who danced for me. -Mark read more

Knockouts really doesn't have many Knockouts..But hey if you're stuck downtown and have nothing else better to do then stop by and have a $2.50 bud light and watch some boobs and booty on stage. What I found funny about this place was the really good looking girls didn't pester you for dances but the not so pretty girls were on the prowl for dances. That did get pretty annoying. But overall there are better strip joints such as TD's north so if your looking for a good time go there instead. read more

The inside was okay, the music a bit loud, the drinks okay, but not a whole lot of knockouts here, sadly. Maybe I came at the wrong time, but the more attractive dancers were the less experienced. I don't want to badmouth anyone, but I wonder what would happen if the dancers were to be drug tested. I might give them another try, maybe. read more

The managers are great, the girls are friendly, the drinks are well-made. Considering downtown Albuquerque is completely uninviting, this place is a gem in a sea of dilapidation. read more

Knock outs is a strip club located in downtown Albuquerque.. I have only been to strip clubs a hand full of times (less than 5). I didn't see any real "knockouts" although there where a few good looking girls. there is a full bar and the waitresses are attentive. I didn't really dig this place but it was nice to come in and have a couple beers and tip the girls. read more

Knockouts has a fun atmosphere and the drinks aren't too expensive. There are a few girls there that shouldn't be dancing but who am I to judge. The girls I go to see are Tori and Arial, they are so sweet and sexy. read more