*** 21+ Club Since They Serve Alcohol, No Minors Allowed. ***…read more As a financially responsible adult (for approximately 17 minutes), I walked into Vanity with a strict budget and one simple rule: Only bring what you're willing to spend. The women were gorgeous, charismatic, and absolutely knew how to work a room. I kept telling myself, "You can't hustle a hustler." Turns out... the real mastermind was the boss. I willingly surrendered the last few dollars I had brought with me, exactly as planned. Then came the plot twist: an $8 Diet Pepsi. I don't know how they did it, but somehow that Diet Pepsi felt like a luxury purchase. Respect. The cover was only $10, and for the laughs, the conversations, the people-watching, and the overall energy, it was money well spent. Sometimes you're not paying for a drink-you're paying for a story you'll laugh about later. Pro Tip: Don't bring your life savings. Don't bring your credit cards. Bring only the amount you're completely comfortable spending, and you'll leave with memories instead of buyer's remorse. I walked out lighter in the wallet but heavier in good memories. You still can't hustle a hustler. Sometimes a hustler just enjoys getting hustled.

My name is Micah groten I loved the lap dance worth every dollar would definitely go again(wish…read morethey had special times if you know what I mean)

I keep reflecting on last night and saying "MY GAY ASS LMFAOOOOOOO"…read more First, the cons: I still don't like that black bald security guy with the straggly beard that works there, he's always specifically rude as hell to me. But everyone else is cool! Moscow Mules are extremely tasty, the latino security guy with the newsboy cap is always friendly and I adore seeing him, Danielle is a great presence, and I was treated nicely here! Hygienic, a nice ambiance, and ladies seem relaxed! FRIDAYS are indeed the best night with other friendly ladies (and some couples, although mostly women) in the audience and couples throwing cash, the ladies working are EXTREMELY friendly and sociable, so if you're nervous, don't be! Get all dolled up and put on a cute fit... the cutest one in your closet, yes THAT one, and wear it here... And bring your cash, 100$ is enough for a great couple's dance (3 songs, and you'll wish it were 5) and 200$ at least if you genuinely wanna have a great time throwing ones and turning up! (Don't be like my date and sulk about not getting a ton of positive attention if you're also not showing positive attention back in the form of tossing ones... As you can imagine, I'll probably avoid bringing him back-) I had an experience with the stripper So-So that was soooooo so incredible that I had the gayest dream I've ever had in my life and woke up the next morning ready to entirely block every man in my phone and be a rich lesbian instead. 11/10 experience Also of course shoutout to Zion, Genesis, and Eliana (Eliana is extremely gorgeous and takes great care of herself, she's fun and sassy,) and admittedly So-So's couple's dance with me and my date last night had me in a DAAAAAAZE, I was literally so faint and swooning after it that I was stumbling around like a newborn baby deer all weak in my knees. (And mind you, I was sober at that point, more than enough water and hours passed, I was euphoric!) It was like getting Snoo-Snoo'd in Futurama, hell yeah So-So! It's almost 6pm the next day and I am swooning even now! (also i forgot, i was dancing at First Fridays in my five inch heels, so i think my knees were genuinely damaged before arriving anyway, I haven't moved all day since getting home... do ur stretches yall) She was laughing to my date like "She's all faint and blushing nowwwww she doesnt know what to do with herself oh my gaaaaaad", and that hater ass security guard said "Needa take their ass HOME", like sir... you're bald and snarky... avoid being seen or heard... (he's mentioned in a previous review about shoving me once, a weirdo) And his hater energy is why its 4 stars, I was amazingly ecstatic and he was a vibe killer, and dampened the experience! but I know deep in my spirit, this place is always a hit, 10/10 and knowing me I'll end up back here in a week and a half with even more cash to throw, anyone I've taken here leaves in all smiles, i slept like a baby and awoke an almost-full-lesbian

Unfortunately between me and all three of my friends we feel like they slipped something in our…read moredrinks.

I was in town for a convention last week and wanted to end my time in SF on a fun note. I told my…read morecabbie that I have never been to a gentlemans club and he said, "I got just the place!" Club is well layed out and looked pretty busy. Almost instantly, this hottie named Jasmine approaches me and we quickly get a room... It was almost a bust night because none of my cards were working, apparently, this is a common trend at these clubs. Luckily, Jasmine was able to set me up with zelle and I was able from then on to transfer directly to her. I had such a great time and left with a smile on my face. So much, that my first review is to give praise to them. I would've given this place 5 stars, but there was creepy old bouncer always peeping through the curtain - made it a little awkward. I guess he thought something was going to happen, but she was in total control. Lol! Next time I am in San Francisco I know exactly where Im heading to and who I am going to see... Thanks again for a terrific night.

The things I saw here.... you talk about making a guy blu.....sh…read more These girls are gorgeous and it's a pretty good time.

went there specifically for the buffet. can't beat $5 on its own. however the fried chicken really…read moreis that good. not salty, fried perfectly and not floury.

Tl;Dr - I mean, if you mess with strip clubs, this is this, that, and a bag of chips. My review is…read moremostly based on casual visits for the lunch buffet, and I didn't get any lap dances. I would assume if I did, they'd be pretty good, haha. This place is pretty legendary in San Francisco, everyone who lives here knows about it. What's particularly noteworthy about the Gold Club beyond their commitment to a classy experience is that they do a $5 buffet that is actually pretty good, where you can kick back and watch some dancers perform. If you aren't the type to get nervous around naked ladies it's a great deal, particularly the fried chicken and the salads with a nice selection of dressings. Drinks aren't too bad either, they really respect your wallet here which is truly unique in the world of stripclubs that basically do everything in their power to separate all your money from that wallet. The girls also I'd say are pretty chill, I'm married and on a look no touch policy and I haven't had anyone be too aggressive with the come-ons, they'll certainly want to sit down and play the hostess cards if you let them but expect to be buying their drinks if they do. Lots of salt daddies in here I would expect would get irritated with those practices but I mean these girls gotta make a living, they not here for free entertainment. So I'll always throw down a few dollars before I leave for whoever is on stage, maybe a few on the table for whoever cleans up, it's a respect thing. The tables, upper level, all are nice. Nice chairs, nice views, good lighting and music. Everything here is exactly what I'd want to see in a high end club like this, and there's rarely any issues with cleanliness that I can see. Again, my experiences are limited so if you coming here for dances, special events, weekends, any of that I wouldn't be the one to talk to. But if you with a couple buddies and want a cheeky lunch hour, yeah you not gonna find something better than this my friend, this is peak mangia, baby!

I am a tour driver, and am all over the country, and this had the BEST bartender I've ever had the…read moreexperience to drink with. Mela has a rock solid body, a great smile, and an attitude that makes you feel like you belong there. She was easy to talk to, and was able to keep up with the conversation. More so Mela was the spark of the night for me, and she will be my next visit, and every visit when I'm here in San Francisco.

I paid for a $150 lap dance but ended up withdrawing $200 from the ATM inside because it didn't…read moreallow me to withdraw the exact amount. When I went to book the dance with the guy managing the payments (an Asian guy who was standing near the screen at the front), I gave him the full $200, expecting $50 back. He only gave me $20 back, which I initially brushed off, assuming he was allocating the remaining $30 as a tip for the dancer. However, after the dance, the dancer herself asked for a tip--making it clear that the clerk had not passed along the rest of my money as a gratuity. At that point, it became obvious that the extra $30 likely never made it to where it was supposed to go. I didn't want to cause a scene, but I left feeling like I'd been shorted and misled. Make sure you check that clerk if you're expecting money back.

I have been coming to Crazy Horse since I was 19 years years old, and I'm dangerously close to 30…read morenow. I have never once had a disappointing trip. I've come with friends on Saturday nights, I've come alone after work, I've come intending to drop $30 and I've come intending to drop $300. The performers are always a delight, the workers in front are always courteous, and it's a very easy place to relax and have four hours slip by before you know it. The performers do work for the tips, and the more you're willing to give them the better time you'll have. If you're sitting in a back row and holding tight onto your wallet you shouldn't expect much other than perhaps a performer to visit you and ask if you want a private tour (which are rather pricy and not particularly eventful), but if you sit up at the stage and ask the front desk to give you a nice stack of $1 bills the amount of interaction you can get is absolutely mind-boggling. Five dollars on the stage will get you more hands-on experience than you've seen since junior prom. Be respectful, keep your hands to yourself unless directed otherwise, and you will have the time of your life.

Last time i entered this place, I noticed a very strong butthole smell permeated the entire area. I…read morecould not tolerate it for more than 40 minutes, so I left.

I can't remember having this much fun. I don't like to think of myself as old but my grandson is in…read morecollege, so I can understand if others think of me that way. My girlfriend and I have been dating about six months. As I rummaged around the internet I come across a story about The Power Exchange. It might be fun, we could go and watch people having fun, maybe play with each other a little, if that feels right. What do we have to lose, if it's to creepy we can just leave. When I mentioned the idea of going to a sex club, my girlfriend, she fired off a string of questions, "Do I want to have sex with other people? Do I want her, to have sex with other people? Are people going to be groping me? Is it just going to be guys with their dicks hanging out .... " No, No, I don't know, maybe, If it's creepy we can leave. The staff is friendly and welcoming. The main room is the size of a basketball court with a disco ball. Near the entrance under a spot light, is a black leather swing, suspended from chains, with stirrups for your feet. I motion towards the swing and ask my friend if she would like to try it? I didn't expect that she would agree since we had just arrived. Without hesitation she climbs up. She is suspended inside the metal frame with her legs far apart and her hands holding the chains behind her head. I Can't believe how beautiful she looks. I grab a nearby chair the perfect height, and sit down to eat as if it's my first meal in a month. She is laying back and allowing me complete access, while I am also able to watch the reaction on her face. What I can't see is the stream of new arrivals that have been standing behind me taking in the view. A hour later we go down stairs where there is a warren of rooms some occupied and others not. My friend and I enter one of the small rooms and spend the next hour touching every part of her. The door is open and I am only vaguely aware of other guests coming and going. The rules of the club require that you ask permission before touching and given that we are completely engrossed in each other "our guests" just watch respectfully before moving on to another room. Staff people on each floor watch to be sure no one is being pressured into anything. We devote the next hour to discover if it really is possible to fuck someones brains out. - As we got to the car my friend said let's do that again. I agree - that was the most fun I have had in years. The only thing that would make this place better is if I could find a parking garage near by that was open late

How ironic for a place located in San Francisco to have an experience that felt anything but LGBTQ+…read morefriendly. My friend came to meet me at this business and was denied entry because they were wearing open-toed shoes, despite being dressed up in leather pants, a mesh top, and a full face of makeup. They were also charged a $100 cover. I arrived shortly after wearing open-toed shoes myself, was allowed right in, and paid a $60 cover. The inconsistency in the dress code enforcement was disappointing, especially when the difference in treatment felt so noticeable. A business in San Francisco should be creating a welcoming environment for everyone--not making people feel singled out.

UPDATE: I visited Eros in its new incarnation -- I'm happy to say that the original vibe and…read moreintent of Eros remains intact. It is a place to see and be seen with various configurations of seating and bunk beds and glory holes -- with condoms and lube plentiful. It is, however, much smaller than it was. There are essentially 4 rooms -- a room of lockers, a bathroom shower area (with only 1 shower), and two play rooms. There is also a small outdoor, vestibule type area where one can smoke. In addition there is a loft area above, but that appears to be only for the staff. But it is also much cleaner than it was -- as it appears the entire space was recently renovated and all materials appear to be new. As other reviewers have noted, this new location is a bit sketchy -- one should park in a garage and be aware if in the neighborhood after dark -- but this is true in many metropolitan areas these days. Overall, I am happy the essence of Eros has remained -- it might be for everyone, but certainly worth checking out!

DIRTY , unprofessional and terrible crowd. I think the…read moreowners live in. By far the worst place I have been to... happy to be alive after this!